My melancholy of a few days ago has subsided a bit, especially after celebrating a joyous occasion with a huge portion of my close and extended family yesterday. I have spent time with most of the close friends I missed so much while gone, and I've even been accepted back at my summer job which I'll start on Wednesday. All in all, I'm feeling a little less "out of it" and a whole lot more "part of it."
There was also an innocuous moment a few days ago when my dog decided 6:30 am was the perfect time to wake up. At her whining command I got out of bed and followed her downstairs to the door. Normally I would just open the door for her, let her do her business, then let her back in, but that day I decided to go outside with her. At that quiet early-morning moment, I stood, breathed, and was washed over with a scent I had forgotten I loved so much. You know how it smells early in the morning, when the dew is just getting warmed by the sun and the grass is particularly green? It's a smell associated with that special feeling of being awake just before everyone else, when the neighborhood is still quietly clutching to the final moments of a dream. It's a smell associated with summer and a frolicking dewy-pawed dog, fewer obligations and walking around barefoot. It's the smell of home.
I breathed slowly and deeply as I tuned my senses to all the things I didn't realize I had missed and finally felt truly happy to be back in the comfort of this particular home.
In some ways it's hard to believe I did what I did - traveled across an ocean, lived nearly half a year in a different country with different languages, learned and worked alongside people from around the globe. I look back and wonder "Did this really happen? Or was it just a dream?" But my e-mails and Facebook conversations in Hebrew, the pictures filling my hard drive, and this blog are all evidence of my journey. They are also reminders of what I am capable of and that maybe the world isn't quite so terrifyingly big after all.
But for now, my journeys as a temporary kibbutznikit are over, so I think it is the perfect time to thank you for reading this and joining me on my journey. I may not know you personally, but knowing you read this, even occasionally, gave me something of a feeling of purpose. At the very least it's nice to know someone is interested in what you're doing. I hope throughout it all you learned something and smiled a bit, and maybe it even gave you the extra little push you needed to go on your own adventure. Lech lecha. Lechi lach. Lechu lachem. לכו לכם
I do have one final request of you, though. Some have recommended I continue writing and I must admit, I do enjoy it. What do you think? Should I keep blogging, throwing my thoughts into cyberspace for the benefit of anyone with a few spare minutes in their day? I'd love to hear from all of you, so please feel free to leave a comment and tell me what you think!
Until next time (whenever that may be), להתראות, au revoir, goodbye. It was wonderful traveling with you :)
You should definitely keep going!!!!!
ReplyDeleteregister a new blog, and keep going.
ReplyDeleteKeep writing, baby. Keep writing.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Mom
Absolutely you should keep writing. You may want a different format or a different venue, but sentences like "It's a smell associated with that special feeling of being awake just before everyone else, when the neighborhood is still quietly clutching to the final moments of a dream" need to find a place where they are written down. It's also obvious that you've processed a lot of your experiences through writing and that your writing and photography provide an important vehicle for your creativity.
ReplyDeleteI'm still figuring out what I think about blogging -- I do think the ones with a specific focus are more successful -- but it may also be a discipline thing -- the ones written every day are also more successful.
I know I'd be happy to read anything you write, and that goes beyond the "aunt job description" -- that is, I read it first because you wrote it, but I read it now because it is interesting and well written.
Let's talk when I get home from vacation.
Amy
I have followed all that you have been doing, and truly enjoyed everything you have written, and pictures posted. You gave me a chance to see and feel Israel as I never have.I experienced the full range of emotions a person can have, not only your writings, but comments made by others.
ReplyDeleteYou diffidently should continue writing as you are extremely good at it, probably gifted, bringing joy and pleasure,to the people following your work. So, go for it girl, you have the right stuff !!
Cousin Lawry